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| Two champs: Rocky . . . and me. |
Anyway, I've been feeling a little less than funny lately . . . maybe you've noticed. I think you probably did; it's likely that the lack of poop jokes on this here bloggy had you feeling, I don't know, mature or something. Pish. Go sip your Scotch in that rocking chair, Grandpa! I'm just gonna hang out here with a hula hoop and my birthday suit, PBR in hand AS IT SHOULD BE. (Nothing against Scotch drinkers, though: even Dan likes Scotch and he's pretty okay. I mean, we're getting married and all, so he must be. Jessica/Kulicking; he's awesome; he's my best friend; I love him.)
I think I was feeling sort of unfunny because I've kind of had to be like a real grown-up lately AND IT WAS TOTALLY BUMMING ME OUT. I do so much better with life when I have absolutely zero responsibilities and owe nothing to nobody. (Double negative ≠ double rainbow.) I could just spend my days chasing butterflies and pretending to make daisy chains (except that they were always with dandelions because I just can't bring myself to pick flowers that haven't already fallen; it hurts my feelings to kill them, and besides, dandelions are weeds anyway) and talking in a British accent and generally flouncing around. It was fun; I was funny.
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| Blurry photos are always the best photos. In this case, at least. |
And then: BOOM. I had responsibilities, deadlines, decisions to make. I became bogged down in a vortex of ickiness, and suddenly I was laying awake at night asking myself scary questions like: "Did I make the right choice?" "What if I had . . .?" and of course the dreaded "Am I good enough?" There's nothing like comparing yourself to other, more successful people to really get yourself motivated. (<--- Just kidding, don't do this; this is a really bad move.)
Needless to say,
I'm so frickin' gold I'm PLATINUM baby!
And you know what? YOU ARE TOO. Thanks for being such phenomenal readers: every time you leave a comment, it makes my heart sing. Also: an angel gets her wings every time you become a Google follower. And by "angel gets her wings" I mean: I feel extremely grateful.
Have an awesome weekend.
P.S. What do you do to get out of a funk?
First and foremost: Did you really -- REALLY -- turn "just kidding" into your name? I mean, really? It took me several minutes of confused staring and re-reading to figure out wtf was going on there. I can't even really describe my initial interpretations. You're lucky that your initials are so awesome, though. Mine only seem to match up with British Knights (do you remember those shoes??), Burger King, and Beyonce Knowles. Though the last is pretty cool when people ask, "WWBKD?", as they commonly do.
ReplyDeleteOkay, now that that's out of the way. I am SO WITH YOU on killing flowers!! I can't bear to hurt a plant! And flowers are the BABY MAKERS! That'd be like stealing a woman's vagina - and that just doesn't sound like fun. Plants need'm, too! But for real. I only take flowers that have naturally fallen or are super loose and are clearly going to fall very soon. We are the true nature lovers ;)
Gold + gold + gold + gold + etc =/= platinum. I'm sorry, but you totally chemistry fail. Stop using bad science to make yourself feel better about yourself. I won't have it.
I'm super happy you're feeling better, though! :) I've been going through really tough times, myself, and it's been killing my positive energy and causing me to view my job as "work" rather than "fun".
In answer to your last question, until I moved to Europe almost three years ago, I used to write a song when I got into a terrible funk. I'd spend 8 hours straight writing and recording a song, and by the time I had the finished product, I felt about 5 million times better. Without that ability, I've had to find other outlets, with little success. I've taken to sleeping too much so I can put off thinking about crap... Pilina helps sometimes. But the actual best for me is venting to my best friends and getting their input. I just don't do it a whole lot because I worry about overloading my friends with my stupidity. :)
What's your usual outlet? Dan? ;)
That was probably the most epic comment ever. Let's do this thang:
Delete1. You know I did! I've been "Jessica/Kulicking" since high school, which obviously makes it legit. I've always felt pretty good about my initials, particularly since they fall right next to each other in the alphabet and that in itself lends its own air of badassery. And you're right: people often ask themselves what would Beyonce Knowles do, and then they go on to be a pop goddess, marry a rap star, and have gobs and gobs of money.
2. We ARE true nature lovers! I adore flowers so much that it honestly hurst my feelings to see someone just pluck them up out of the ground for their own enjoyment. There's a reason why we STOP and smell the flowers, no? You pause for a moment, then continue on your merry way, leaving the flowers to be sniffed by future nature lovers.
3. I never said I was a chemist, dammit. Just a wizard overlord . . .
4. Thank you! I hope that your positive energy returns quickly - it's always such a good feeling when you wake up one morning and those blues have blown away.
5. Dan is, of course, my usual outlet, though I have been known to bring problems to girlfriends and/or Mom. Boys have a funny thing where they typically have a solution, whereas girls are good for strictly listening and supporting, so I find both kinds of input necessary for in life. Sometimes I just need a pity party and some ice cream - solutions can wait 'til the morning.
Maybe it might be worth it for you to invest in an instrument while you're in Europe, so you can have the outlet you love most. I also found it helpful sometimes to pick up a new hobby or skill, sometimes that would exercise my brain in a different way. Speaking of which, exercise itself is great for when I'm feeling down, though I find it so difficult to get motivated to start jogging or something while on the road.
Thank you for your comment, Bri! ;-)
You SHOWERED this morning?
ReplyDeleteNot only did I shower yesterday, I showered AGAIN today. Just trying to treat the world to a better me, as my mother suggests.
DeleteWhenever I'm feeling like this I keep in mind that I am no different than Steve Jobs or a hobo. We all have the same potential, we're made out of the same stuff. The difference is just what we choose to focus our minds on.
ReplyDeleteAnd then I tell my negative thoughts to go to hell!
Jenn, I love the way you so succinctly put it: "I keep in mind that I am no different than Steve Jobs or a hobo. We all have the same potential." Such great words of wisdom, and something that I am definitely going to remember for the future.
DeleteWhat a fantastic comment; thank you so much! ;-)